EROTIC MAGAZINE FOR WOMEN AND COUPLES » Sex Tips and Insights » Blow jobs, are we doing it right?

Fellatio, blow jobs, head, oral, whatever you call it, we want to know if we’re doing it right?

Fellatio is the act of sexually stimulating a penis with your mouth—sounds simple enough right? Turns out there are many more tricks to blow jobs and giving your lover the best head of their life. It could be a simple switch of position, a flick of the tongue in the right place—or even concentrating on other erogenous zones of the body at the same time, you can really improve your technique with a little experimentation.

Section 1: Planning stage

To get the most of your blow job technique, why not start the seduction long before the main event. Drop hints in the morning or send little sexy texts through the day to ensure your lover has one thing on their mind… or one thing going through their head…

If you’ve been planning your master strokes all day without them knowing and they walk through the door and you pounce, you might be expecting a fully aroused erection springing enthusiastically to attention. If that isn’t the case and your lover isn’t quite in the same headspace as you. It might be disappointing and feel like a knockback.

If you’ve devoted most of your day to think about just how fantastic your skills are and how much pleasure you’re going to give, and your lover is not in the mood, it can be disheartening. It might make for a more successful evening by dropping sexy hints throughout the day so you’re both hot and bothered by the time you get together. If you’re not used to sexting, a simple ‘I have a sexy surprise for you when you get home’ could be enough to pique interest and sew the seed of sex in their mind and body.

2 – Take it slow

You don’t need to dive straight to the crotch and tear off trousers right away. Indulge in some deep snogging and kissing, allowing your lips and tongue to continue the seduction traps laid by your saucy texts. As you press up against each other you’ll be feeling the nudge of an erection between you both in no time.

3 – Anywhere but the cock!

Oh, this might sound cruel, but take your time to explore around your lover’s body, taking care to avoid the obvious place… Go as close as you can without touching it, bury your face into their pubic hair, gathering the lustful pheromones, this, in turn, will drive you wild. All those incredible delicious love hormones emanating and buzzing forth. Use your nails and fingertips to drag and tease their inner thigh. Use feather-light touch and watch as their cock twitches and take delight in the fact that you are causing this. Witness the balls tighten and lift as you lean in slightly, hinting that you might be about to take a taste…

4 – Enjoy the sensation of working gently and slowly to the main event

Take time to appreciate the shining hard glorious erection before you. Let your lover know you worship every part of them.

5 – Ask!

We always come back to this tip for all our sex talk. Communication is by far the sexiest thing you can do with your partner—even if you’re shy, you might find asking brings you the reassurance and guidance you need to fulfil both of your fellatio desires.

Girl with sultry look giving a man a sexy erotic blow job

from the film TASTY TREAT

6 – Be genuine in your desire to give head

The biggest tip that came up time after time (apart from the end of the penis 😉) was about being genuine. If you are enthusiastic and really want to blow their mind—the biggest turn on for your lover is that you be enjoying yourself as you deliver the pleasure. The lucky thing on the receiving end will absolutely know. Even if you’re still not convinced about your skills, the fact that you are loving it will go a long way and may even be better than a perfect technique without inner enthusiasm.

Ms Haiku sums it up beautifully. “Enjoy it, and show you’re enjoying it. Encourage them to express their enjoyment in it. Feedback loop joy achievement unlocked!”

Airies Dreamer is all about the tease. “For me, I like to tease a lot. I start at the nipples and kiss my way down and around the thigh area, brushing my lips vaguely over the cock area.”

Section 2: To the cock!

Basically, almost any mouth action will bring pleasure so don’t worry about doing things wrong. One word of caution: teeth—be sure to keep your teeth out of the way, accidental nips or scraping can be painful and damage delicate skin. Encourage your lover to signal when they like something and of course, when they don’t.

We’ve compiled some favourite moves and practical tips.

So you’ve breathed in their scent, cupped their balls teased them to within an inch of their life, and now it’s time to take a taste of that glorious erection right in your line of vision.

Start with a gentle flick to the tip of the cock head, it might even have a jewel of precum for you to savour, make sure you do savour it, showing that you love their taste. Missy from Focussed and Filthy has many techniques to get the most from your mouth action, with the emphasis again on teasing, but also repeating the things they tend to like.

“Tongue and lick around the rim and head of the cock until they are getting desperate and then,” the moment we’ve all been waiting for, “take a full mouthful of cock. Keep repeating. Tease and indulge.”

Black and white image of a sexy girl giving a blow job and wanking another cock

from the films TOO PRECIOUS and BOY OH BOY

Missy also recommends making a swallowing motion when you have the cock deep in your mouth, this will give a deep stroking action near your throat and give a satisfying squeeze around the head. You can follow this up by running the tip of your tongue up one side of the shaft, around the top and back down again.

Bringing us back to communication and connection, Missy advises taking the cock as deep as you can and then do this killer move: “Once you have the cock as far back as you can get it look at them straight in the eye. Hot as fuck.”

Another show of enthusiasm which some people might worry about is if you take it a little too deep and start to gag. Missy challenges this: “If you press back harder and make yourself gag while watching them and they know you’ve done it for them it’s super-hot.”

Gagging on a hard cock can also help make extra lubrication—we got this practical tip from Topher Taylor for when you maybe indulging in a long sucking session and things might have dried up a little, “When things start drying up – gag on it. Brings spit up.”

In this situation, don’t be afraid to try some flavoured lubes to give an added dynamic.

“I enjoy mixing it up with kisses, tongue, nibbles and my hands. Mmm!”

As Little Switch Bitch mentions, be sure to use your hands, there’s something very sexy about gripping your fist around your lover’s cock as you feast on the head. This can help if you are fearful of accidentally taking it too deep—you want to give your lover a good time, but not choke yourself doing it (too much).

Gripping around the shaft can mean you can really suck hard and fast, head bobbing frantically without worrying you’ll go too far. A nice fist barrier. You can always masturbate them at the same time to heighten the experience. If you can allow the erect penis into your throat, it can be a very pleasurable and intense sensation but the fist grip can be just as good.

Your jaw might be aching a little by now, so don’t worry about taking a break to focus on other areas for a while. Take your attention down to their perineum, an often-overlooked erogenous zone. The shaft of the penis or its ‘roots’ go right under the testicles so plenty of lovely places to explore there.

You could cup the balls in one hand and massage the perineum in the other, right to the anus, slipping a finger dangerously close to the most sensitive of places. Careful now, this could tip them over the edge!

Our very own Posy Churchgate agrees: “Stroking and massaging the perineum while sucking, combined with some anal stimulation seems to work wonders.”

Move one hand back up to the penis and have a suck on each testicle, rolling gently (very gently) one then the other, delighting in the way the skin skates over the smooth tissue beneath.

Be sure to keep flicking your gaze up to your lover’s face, watch for tells of pleasure and impending orgasm so you know when to ease off, especially if you are wanting to try out some orgasm control and edging. Watching their abdomen flutter because of a move you made, is intoxicating indeed.

Back to the sucking action, behave as if this is the most delicious thing you have ever tasted, why not try humming or causing vibrations with noises, even if something doesn’t quite hit the spot, don’t worry, try something else, keep it light-hearted and fun. Sub Bee finds this the key. Sub Bee “Keeping going is the fun part, the giggles and whimpers are just delicious.”

Get experimental! If you’re sipping on some champagne, why not take a mouthful before engulfing your lover in a flurry of cold bubbles and warm tongue in cheek action? Or even a mouthful of warm tea, new sensations, sending tingles and different experiences all add to the enthusiasm even if some of the things don’t quite work for you. It’s fun trying them out!

And we’re off!

The tell-tale groans emanate from above, perhaps some fingers have become entwined in your hair and are now gripping tighter, a pulsing rises from the root of their shaft and their balls tighten, oh yes, we’re close now!

At this point, if you’ve decided it’s time to let your lover come, don’t stop whatever it is you are doing to elicit these reactions! If you have a nice fast rhythm going, don’t stop! The key is to listen to what their body and hopefully voice is telling you. Hopefully, yeah, yeah, harder faster or keep going, or don’t stop. All signs pointing to comeville.

Redhead woman kissing black man's stomach before giving him a blow job

from the film OPPOSITE PLEASURE

As the surge builds from groin to shaft and up through the head and you will be victorious!

If you aren’t keen on having ejaculate in your mouth and you aren’t using condoms, now would be a good time to release the cock from your mouth but keep holding tight, using your hands to keep pumping, aiming to their torso. Watching come spurt out over their body as they twitch and writhe can be super satisfying and exciting, the ribbons of white liquid spattering over your spent lover, lovely!

Or some would rather it rain down on them, being adorned with a pearl necklace.

If you are letting your lover orgasm in your mouth, hold one until they’ve fully climaxed before spitting, if you’re swallowing, just drink it down until you’ve taken your fill, feasting on the glorious prize.

Missy has some great advice post-orgasm: “Finally, be super careful after they have come. It’s often very sensitive and not always pleasant to keep going. Gentle licks to get the last drop is allowed. But if they want you off don’t be offended.”

Of course, the opposite might be true, like this lovely scene from PJA Woode: “Keep going when I come and milk me fully, then kiss me, deeply, afterwards and share my come with me.”

For some delicious films to give you some oral inspiration why not try our Blowjobs category.

You can even join classes to help improve your technique:

Playing the Flute at Coco de Mer.

Blow His Mind classes at ShWomenstore in London, declared ‘high-end head’ by Time Out Magazine. “The aim is for guests to strut out of the session as the Sex Goddesses they are. We’ll cover anatomy, share tips & tricks (including how to best deal with sticky moments), and there is a practical too…” Renee Dyer, Sh store manager.

The biggest bit of advice that came up time and time again during researching this article, was, be enthusiastic! Enjoy yourself and take your own pleasure in giving head.

 

The Editor

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