You may have noticed our recent magazine articles on sex in pregnancy and beautiful erotic films on pregnancy sex about sex in pregnancy, but what is it really like? We asked how you found sex in pregnancy and the results were varied but all had one thing in common, earth shattering libido boosting, or no thank you, sex was definitely different!
How did you find sex during pregnancy?
Alethea makes a really important point about the types of sex when pregnant and asks how we get information surrounding that. When sex is rarely discussed during routine midwife appointments, who do you ask about kink?
“I’ve had 4 pregnancies. No medical issues to speak of that affected sex except hip dysplasia in the end of pregnancy 3 and in 4, which meant you can’t open your legs, so no missionary possible. But lots you could do. Pregnancies 1 and 4 absolutely sex mad from pretty much beginning to end and it was great… everything felt more aligned somehow so orgasms without other stimulus (other than penis-in-vagina) were easy.
Just generally really happy memories of wanting and getting really well fucked.
We normally have a not particularly vanilla sex life and we found it hard to work out what was still ok… like asking your GP about sex is normal, but asking how hard you can be spanked and how blood pressure affects bondage positions is a little trickier. This was 2007 the first time, so I had no idea where to ask those questions.
Is anal sex ok in trimester 3? Is not something I felt I could ask my midwife. So we kept everything toned down and I missed kink in pregnancy more than coffee, because we just didn’t know what we could do!”
As with everything and something we are striving for at FrolicMe – discussions around sex and especially pleasure should be a normal and healthy part of being a human – at a time when intimacy with your partner is so important, good sex education and talk should be a priority. Knowing what kinds of sex are safe to indulge in is key to keeping you satisfied and close – lord knows, if this is the first baby you’re expecting, you’ll have precious little time to indulge in your sexual pleasure after it is born!
Honey highlights a recurring theme perfectly. Heightened libido.
“Horny. I was very horny as long as I wasn’t throwing up. It was a different horn though.
It was most similar the horn that I get at my period. It might sound a bit mean but it isn’t lustful horn. I wasn’t overtaken with feelings of desire for my partner. I didn’t suddenly find him irresistible. I needed to be being fucked. I needed a cock in my cunt. It was a horn more similar to the food cravings type of need.”
How did you find sex later in your pregnancy?
Livvy wrote this wonderful article on second trimester sex on the ways the uterus can contract during orgasm and the sensations and thoughts this elicits.
“I had no idea quite how much my uterus was involved in my orgasms but, wow, it really contracts as I come and remains firm for a good few minutes afterwards. I can’t decide if these pleasurable contractions are a new feature of my pregnant uterus or if it is simply a matter of my uterus being just so much bigger now that I can’t mistake where this sensation is coming from.
I’ve found clitoral orgasms harder to reach when having partnered sex. Even when masturbating, there feels like much more of a cliff edge to approach and push over than before – the build up to clitoral orgasms is harder and more effortful, without much change in the resultant orgasm. In contrast, pelvic and internal orgasms having become much, much easier and much, much stronger! Whether it is because of increased blood flow or my renewed attention to pelvic floor exercises, penetration feels a lot better and I come much more easily this way now than before. It’s been quite a revelation!”
Did your pregnancy affect your libido?
Pink Gilly had experiences we can’t help but be a little envious of!
“So horny both pregnancies and totally multi orgasmic with the second one, it’s never left it’s like my body kept hold of that bit.”
Lucky Gilly! We are very inspired that a multi orgasmic existence might remain after a pregnancy – after all, the strain put on your body is likened to a year of training for the Marines! So yes, we welcome the possibility that there could be some residual perks.
What if your libidos just don’t match? Here we have someone who shares their thoughts on this very experience.
Anon – “I had no idea that sex and libido would be different during pregnancy, none of my midwives or health visitors mentioned it, and even in the literature they gave out – it wasn’t really deemed important enough… which is so strange considering my sex drive went through the roof. The only person that even broached the subject was my very Christian cousin who said I might feel a little more ‘juicier down there’. And some! Wow! I would have literally shagged the floor! If I was awake, I was either craving sex or sleep. Totally exhausted for nine months but utterly horny at the same time.
Orgasms were plentiful and easy to achieve, I was like a nymphomaniac but there was one big snag. My partner simply didn’t find my pregnant state a turn on at all. They lost all interest in sex and their libido was dead. It was honestly heart-breaking and super frustrating! I just had to find ways to please myself with masturbation and toys – using anything I could find if the mood swept through me and I just needed to come NOW! I still have a dolphin shaped back massager that I look at with fond memories of this time…”
So there you have it. Some lovely stories of how increased sex drive during pregnancy can have you delirious with desire as your bump grows. And we say, take advantage of this horny time and who knows, your body might just hang on to some sexy revelations and retain some multi orgasmic knowledge for future use, just like lucky Gilly!
For beautiful inspiration and depictions of lovemaking and sex during pregnancy please watch our erotic movie on the pleasure of pregnancy sex and another erotic film on partnered pleasure during pregnancy