It’s interesting that in this day of rising female empowerment and the growth of the #metoo movement, are we actually helping to close another gap that exists between the sexes when it comes to our sexual pleasure? With that, I mean the “orgasm gap”.
Yes, there is a statistical gap in the rate women achieve orgasms over that of men. Yet importantly we are learning that sexual pleasure is very much associated with our physical and mental wellbeing and is key to our overall health and happiness, so this is something we very much need to improve.
Sadly our culture is such that there is an imbalance in our ability to receive sexual pleasure aptly known as the orgasm gap, which in heterosexual sex has become well documented by much research.
Statistics point out that men pretty much orgasm 85% of the time whereas women will orgasm less than 63% the Kinsey Institute shows.
Why we should ask is that? After all our female bodies are more designed for pleasure to that of men. Our clitoris only has a very singular purpose, that of pleasure alone. Therefore how do we build a culture of real gender equality where the understanding of female pleasure is part of the sex-positive information that is more openly relayed while stopping culture focusing solely on male pleasure and unhealthy stereotypes?
Well, when you look deeper into the situation you soon realize it is far more complicated and multifaceted, however, understanding and being aware of our own female pleasure is key.
Somehow when we grow up and start to learn about sex we don’t focus enough on female pleasure and how we can achieve that. The focus is always placed on male pleasure and penetrative sex rather than seeing the pleasure deriding foreplay as equally important and part of the overall sexual intercourse.
Only 23% of women are suggested to achieve orgasm through penetration alone, so immediately that identifies the need to understand all other areas of stimulation and pleasure to help balance the Orgasm Gap.
Clitoral stimulation is vital as well as other arousing other erogenous zones over our body. We women are very sexual creatures and our bodies are more designed for experiencing a great deal of sexual pleasure, more so than men but it all isn’t located in one place. Too often our sexual zone is thought of in a single word “vagina” but misses placing awareness and understanding on the epicentre, that being the clitoris and its 8,000 nerve endings just in its tip. That is double the number of those in a penis, whereas the actual vaginal tunnel has almost no sensation at all. Therefore learning the value of masturbating helps women enormously to not only help achieve orgasm but educate themselves on how they can achieve orgasm, as we all respond differently.
Incorporating mutual masturbating into your sexual relationship will also bring about the chance for your partner to see how, what and where you enjoy the pleasure of touch and how in turn your body responds. Not only is it hugely educational, it allows you to communicate visually, open up dialogue as well as enjoy getting very turned on and the likelihood of achieving mutual orgasm definitely increases. Taking away the issue of penetration allow for sex toys to be incorporated easily and the value of vibrators to stimulate and arouse your clitoris is invaluable. Just like erotic films, sex toys are a valuable asset in our pleasure box of tools to help stimulate and arouse.
We are becoming a more open society when it comes to sex, but still have a way to go to understand that women too have a right to seek their own sexual pleasure. We need to encourage awareness and dialogue and provide better information on sexual satisfaction and show how good sex can be for all parties, then we can feel the full benefits of our equality.