A Guide to the Best Sex Positions

We all have our favourite go-to positions for sexy shenanigans, but it’s all too easy to get into a rut purely through habit. In this article, we’ll go through a few of the best sex positions and discuss why some people find them so good (the fact that they work—and work well—is why they’re popular).

This isn’t a checklist for scoring athletic points; instead, see it as a friendly guide—here to give you pointers towards ways of expanding your sexual repertoire with the aim of giving even more satisfaction to both you and your partner(s).

In order to make this guide easier to read, much of it is written as if those involved are a cis-het couple, but please be reassured that the actual orientation/gender of the participants is pretty much irrelevant—almost everything here can be wriggled around to work for any body, in any combination. 

Missionary

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The missionary is one of the best-known and familiar sex positions and is thought to be the most common sexual position used by heterosexual couples.

How to: With the female lying on her back, legs slightly spread, the male lies on top with his legs in between hers, allowing for full penis in vagina penetration. Missionary is also, for people of all genders and sexual orientations, one of the easiest to achieve.

Benefits: It’s often the position couples end up in naturally during foreplay, as it allows for face-to-face intimacy. Depending on individual physiognomy, some lucky vulva owners find that the pressure of their partner pushing down on them stimulates the clitoris in a way that enables them to orgasm without any other stimulation. A few even luckier people might find that their G-spot is also in the perfect position for sexual pleasure in this position. Missionary is by far the easiest position for beginners, as there are no awkward angles to work out. Gravity and instinct do a lot of the work for you both, and it enables both partners to communicate intimately throughout.

Tips: To spice things up, add in this final step: Begin as normal with the receiving partner lying flat with their legs spread slightly, whilst the giver lies on top and between their legs in order to allow for penetration. The receiving partner can then lift their legs up and around their partner’s waist in order to alter the depth of penetration.

Missionary is sweet and simple and easy to adapt to suit, so it’s no wonder that it’s one of the most popular sex positions in history!

Reverse missionary 

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As with the missionary position, reverse missionary involves both partners lying face-to-face during penetration—the only difference is that (surprise!) positions are reversed.

How to: The receiving person sits astride and lowers themself onto their partner’s penis or strap-on. They then lean forward and wriggle their legs down until they’re lying on top of the penetrating partner. 

Benefits: There are many variations on the reverse missionary position, which just goes to prove that even the simplest moves can be overcomplicated if you try hard enough. Never fear—this is, in reality, a really simple position that takes very little effort but can give great rewards.

The reverse missionary position has similar benefits to its simpler predecessor in that it allows for physical intimacy and face-to-face contact. In addition, the receiving partner may well find that this position not only gives them more control of depth of penetration, etc., but it also increases stimulation to the clitoris (and potentially the prostate if the receiving partner is male).

Cowgirl

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The cowgirl position is exactly how it sounds—one partner sits astride the other and rides them like, well, a cowgirl. 

How to: The giving partner lies flat on their back, whilst the receiving partner sits astride their hips and lowers themselves into position. Cowgirl (note that this position isn’t gender-specific—cowboys are always welcome) allows the receiving partner to control the depth and speed of thrusting whilst allowing the more passive partner underneath a full view of the sexy show. 

Benefits: The advantage that cowgirl has over the reverse missionary is that the active top partner’s clitoris or penis is more accessible, enabling either partner to give extra stimulation for those out-of-this-world body-shaking orgasms.

Reverse cowgirl 

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An obvious step up from cowgirl, reverse cowgirl can be a slightly awkward position to get into, but it’s definitely worth the effort.

How to: The mechanics are pretty straightforward—the top partner sits astride the lower person’s hips as before, but facing towards their feet. 

Benefits: Reverse cowgirl is an ideal variation for those who enjoy sex from behind, as it gives the prone partner a full view of their partner. It also offers slightly different stimulation due to the change in angles—male receiving partners may well find that it puts delicious pressure on the prostate.

Doing it doggy-style

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When you want to lose yourselves in sensation and not think about anything except what you’re feeling, doggy style can be the perfect go-to position. It gives big results for relatively little effort and can be hugely satisfying for both parties.

How to: At its most basic, doggy style is simply one person positioned on their hands and knees whilst the giving partner penetrates them from behind. This is absolutely not a penis-in-vagina-only manoeuvre—the potential for strap-ons and/or anal penetration means that the finer details can be wriggled to suit pretty much any combination of bodies.

Benefits: If the receiving partner enjoys double penetration, then doggy style is perfect – the person on top can penetrate either vaginally or anally whilst also inserting a dildo or butt plug for double the sensation. This also increases the levels of pressure and sensation for the penetrating partner, so it’s a win-win situation.

Doggy style can be a good option for when the receiving partner is pregnant, as the position means that the weight of their stomach isn’t pressing down on them. So long as you’re very careful about not penetrating too hard or deep, it can make penetrative sex achievable right up until the end of pregnancy.

Tip: Altering the angle of this position also changes the depth of penetration and how it stimulates. Those who enjoy really deep penetration can push their backside right up in order to give their partner as much access as possible, whereas those who don’t can slide forward for shallower entry.

This position also leaves good access to the clitoris (or penis, if the receiving partner has one), and the person doing the penetrating can reach around in order to provide extra stimulation. Or the receiving partner might find it easier to slide forward until their head and one arm is resting on the bed, then slide their free hand underneath in order to stimulate themselves as their partner concentrates on the joys of penetration.

Another way of increasing tightness and stimulation is for the receiving partner to slide down until they are completely flat on their face, with their legs tightly closed—the penetrating partner lies on top of them with their legs astride and penis or strap-on still inside. This position can be surprisingly intimate due to the physical closeness and often creates deeply pleasurable sensations for both parties. 

Sitting in their lap 

There are several different varieties of sitting sex positions. Most of them are pretty straightforward, and they all offer the potential for you to wriggle things to suit you. And, of course, if you’re sitting facing each other, then everything is more intimate as it allows for kissing, fondling and talking at the same time as penetration. 

Face-to-face

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Let’s start with the obvious one.

How to: The giving partner sits on a chair or similar, with the receiving person astride them on their lap. But this is often easier said than done, and there are a few things to bear in mind. Most importantly, make sure you’re using a very sturdy chair! There’s nothing worse than ending up in the nearest ER because the furniture has collapsed mid-fun times. It often helps to ensure the chair is wedged against a solid wall so that the giving partner can push back against it without toppling over.

Tip: Some chair arms are not your friend here—the receiving partner needs to be able to sit with their legs fully astride in order to maximise penetration. Of course, if either partner is concerned about stability and/or doesn’t want quite such deep penetration, then a sofa can be a good option – it allows the lower partner to sit comfortably for a long time, whilst the receiving partner can kneel over them in comfort. 

Leaning

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How to: Get yourselves into a sitting sex position and make sure that you’re both securely balanced. The upper receiving partner can then lean backwards, increasing both pressure and stimulation and also allowing access to their clitoris or penis for either their partner or themselves. 

Tip: If you’re confident in the giving partner’s levels of arm strength, then hold hands (or grip each other’s wrists for added security) and let them hold your weight as you lean backwards as far as you can manage. You might be surprised at the difference in pressure you can achieve!

Facing away 

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How to: That is exactly what it sounds—the receiving partner sits on the other person’s lap but facing away from them. Think of it as a seated reverse cowgirl, with the lower partner helping to keep the receiving person balanced as they rock themselves to ecstasy.

Tip: Those with particularly long legs might even be able to put your feet on the floor and push yourself up and down (you can always balance yourself by resting your hands on your partner’s knees). Also known as the Lap Dance position.

Sideways sex 

Lying on your sides can be one of the easiest and most comfortable sex positions for both partners—it really is all the fun for the least effort.

Spooning

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How to: The first side-by-side sex position that most people try is spooning because it often happens naturally when two people are curled up together.

Tip: The giving partner can wrap their arms over and around the receiver and penetrate from behind, enabling comforting closeness. Spooning can be especially good during pregnancy, as it allows the woman to lie comfortably with her stomach propped with pillows if needed.

Binding

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How to: A slightly extended version of spooning, ‘binding’, is side-by-side sex that starts in the same way, but both partners tilt their weight backwards slightly so that the person in front can sling their upper leg backwards over their partner’s body.

Benefits: Binding is as simple and comforting as spooning for most people but allows access to the breasts and clitoris. It’s also a good side-by-side position if you’re going for the anal option but want the closeness of spooning.

Grasshopper

Another position that’s easier to do than it is to explain.

How to: The grasshopper is a form of side-by-side sex that is really just a variation on spooning in which both participants usually lie on a sofa. Imagine the binding position but with a bit more agility. Assuming both parties are lying on their left side, the man is at the rear on the sofa, propped up on his left elbow with both legs bent and his right knee upright so that his right foot is flat on the sofa. With us so far? 

The woman then slides in front of him as if to assume a spooning position but spreads her legs—the left tiptoes will just about touch the floor, whilst her right leg is held up in the air. This enables deep penetration from behind whilst also freeing up her breasts and clitoris for stimulation and enabling close contact and kissing.

The Spork 

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Okay, we know this isn’t the sexiest of names for a sexy position. But hear us out because it really is pretty accurate. Literally a cross between spooning and, well, forking, the spork is another low-energy/high-reward side-by-side sex position that’s well worth checking out.

How to: The receiving partner lies flat on their back (you might find that a well-placed pillow underneath their bottom gives a better angle of penetration), with the giver positioned slightly on their side but at right angles to their partner. The woman then wraps one leg over their partner’s shoulder and the other around their waist. It needs a little bit of dexterity in order to position things correctly (which is where the cushions come in handy), but with luck, you’ll find that it gives easy access to the clitoris and breasts whilst allowing deep penetration at what many find to be a satisfyingly different angle.

Legs over shoulders 

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So long as the receiving partner doesn’t have any major joint issues, legs over shoulder sex is a fairly easy and simple manoeuvre for most couples.

How to: Start in the missionary position, then the giving partner sits back on their knees and slides the receiver’s legs up and over their shoulders. Depending on the prone person’s levels of flexibility, the giving partner can lean forward at deeper angles in order to increase both tension and stimulation.

Benefits: The advantages of having your legs over a partner’s shoulders are that penetration is usually deeper, and it can help to increase stimulation to the clitoris (and if it doesn’t, then the clitoris is easily accessible for either partner to stimulate manually). There are also the obvious benefits of being face to face and able to talk and to see each other’s expressions, etc.

Butterfly

How to: The butterfly position is exactly the same as standard legs-over-shoulders sex but with the giving partner standing at the side of the bed (or table, if you’ve got one that’s sturdy enough). If you’re using the bed, then you might find it helpful to adjust the receiving partner’s position with pillows underneath their bottom.

Tip: This position can be easier for the giving partner, as they’re upright and well-balanced on their feet, so can alter the depth and angle of penetration as desired. 

Scissor sex position 

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Most people think of the scissor sex position as the go-to manoeuvre for lesbian partnerships, but it can be made to work for all partnership/genital combinations. Scissoring is a sexual position where partners face each other and spread their legs allowing their genitals to meet and grind against each other as if they are two pairs of scissors joining where the blades intersect.

How to: The variant of scissoring that most people think of is when two women wriggle themselves into position so that both their vulvas and clitoris touch before pressing and grinding against each other with the aim of mutual satisfaction. It takes a reasonable amount of physical effort but is absolutely worth it.

But the scissor sex position can be altered to suit pretty much everyone—especially when you realise that it doesn’t have to be both partners doing the scissoring. The essence of this position is that at least one of you has their legs apart and is grinding against the other, so if it suits you better to take it in turns to ‘ride’ each other’s legs, hands or whichever body part you most fancy, then scissor away!

Oh, and yes, it’s possible to have PIV sex in the scissor sex position. You’re going to need a decent level of agility and flexibility, but the unusual angle of penetration really can bring something new to the bedroom. The person with the penis (or strap-on) kneels on the bed but then moves one leg up so that they are balanced on one knee and one foot. The receiving partner lies on their back with their legs apart and knees bent, then wriggles into position—you should end up at more or less right angles to each other. This position is also great for increasing clitoral stimulation, as the receiving partner’s vulva will be pressed against their partner’s thigh.

Benefits: The real joy of the scissor sex position is that it forces you to slow down and enjoy the ride, quite literally. It’s a more subtle and seductive way of getting your rocks off and well worth the effort. 

69 

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Aah, the good old ‘69’ —butt of teenage jokes since the dawn of time, but also one of the easiest (and potentially very satisfying) positions to try out. Its other popular name, soixante-neuf, only dates back to 1790s France, but definitely sounds sexier. The name comes, of course, from the position itself—two human bodies lying head-toe and looking for all the world like the numbers 6 and 9.

How to: In its most basic form, the 69 is simply mutual oral sex. One partner lies flat on their back, and the other lies on top of them in the opposite direction so that each has their genitals in an accessible position for the other’s mouth. Of course, it isn’t always this simple—for one thing, getting into the right position assumes that both partners are of similar height in order for the important areas to be in the right place. If height differences make standard 69 all but impossible, you might find it easier to lie on your sides—this way, no one has to worry about balancing themselves or potentially squishing their partner, and it’s easier to bend your bodies into position. Side-lying 69 also gives both partners equal control over movement and oral penetration, which is especially helpful for those with an over-enthusiastic gag reflex.

Legend has it that some particularly strong/brave people are capable of managing 69 sex whilst standing up. It is indeed feasible—one partner stands upright and grips the other upside down against them in the relevant position—but unless one of you is a professional strong(wo)man and the other a superlight nymph, it’s probably not worth risking the ensuing physio fees.

Benefits: One of the main joys of 69 is that it gives you a real closeup view of your partner’s most intimate spots, which some people find an enormous turn-on. And because you’re so up close and personal, there’s always the option of extra vaginal or anal stimulation, whether with your fingers or a sex toy. The sense of ‘fulness’ from being orally stimulated whilst also being penetrated sends many people off into pure orgasmic bliss—and you can get them there with minimal physical effort.

Of course, 69 isn’t just reserved for couples—you can always add more people in a circular link, each one pleasuring and being pleasured in turn.

Tip: Because of the ubiquity of 69 sex in general conversation, it’s easy to assume that anyone and everyone is at it. But many people find it just too much—they’d rather concentrate on either giving or receiving and find the added stimulation distracting. Never forget that it is absolutely fine not to like any sexual position, whether that’s because it doesn’t suit you physically or simply doesn’t float your boat. Sex should be a joyous thing, not a competition.

Sex-from-behind

While doggy-style sex mentioned above is certainly one of the most well-known sex from behind activities, we thought we’d share a few more to add to your sexy repertoire.

Corkscrew 

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The ‘corkscrew’ description for this sex-from-behind position denotes a twist in the receiving partner’s position that can increase both pressure and stimulation. It’s easier to describe it from the point of view of ‘man’ and ‘woman’ but, as always, both roles are adaptable for any combination with a bit of imagination. 

How to: The woman sits on the edge of the bed, or a firm bench, then twists her upper body sideways, resting her weight on one hip and arm. Her partner stands upright with his legs astride her and penetrates from behind. Imagine spooning, but upright and with a twist. If the receiving partner can clench their legs tightly together, it will increase the tightness against the penis or strap-on, increasing stimulation for both parties.

Flatiron

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How to: A variation on sex from behind in which the receiving person lies flat, face-down with legs pressed together, but then raises their hips. The giving partner kneels behind and astride the receiver’s legs, then leans forward and over as they penetrate, resting their weight on their hands. They can grip their partner’s hands at the same time if the receiver enjoys the power play of feeling pinned down. The slightly elevated angle combined with the upper partner leaning over enables deeper penetration—especially if the receiver thrusts back slightly to meet their partner—and good control of movement without too much physical effort.

Benefits: The flatiron position also offers increased stimulation as the receiver’s legs are pushed tightly together. An alternate version of the flatiron sees the receiving partner twist so that their upper body is almost sideways, which enables both partners to kiss and fondle to their mutual hearts’ content. 

Wheelbarrow 

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The wheelbarrow is another sex-from-behind technique, but one that requires a reasonable amount of strength and dexterity from both partners. And—for a change—this is a position that’s far easier to explain than it is to do.

How to: The receiving partner gets down on their hands and knees, then the giver stands upright behind them and lifts them up by their hips until they’re high enough for penetration. The lower partner wraps their legs around the giver’s waist and balances their weight on their hands. It gives the penetrating partner an amazing view, and the receiver presumably develops excellent muscle strength in their arms.

Ballet dancer position

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Ballet dancer sex sounds delicate and fragile, but it can be as passionate as you want to make it.

How to: Another move that requires a fair amount of agility, the ballet dancer, involves both people standing upright facing each other before the receiving partner lifts one leg and wraps it around their partner’s waist. This is where ballet dancing comes in—you’ll end up perched on the ball of one foot whilst your partner holds your leg up around themselves and uses the angle to penetrate whilst still standing up.

Tip: It can be made slightly less precarious by having the receiving partner standing with their back to a wall, so they don’t have to concentrate quite so much on keeping their balance. If you can master the technique, then you’ll find it gives good control over penetration and, depending on the angles created by individual bodies, can also create intense clitoral stimulation.

Golden arch 

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How to: A position sometimes known as ‘bridges’, the giving partner in a golden arch sits up on a flat surface with their legs straight out in front of them. The other person then lowers themselves down onto their partner, sliding their own legs out straight ahead as they do so. 

Benefits: Not only does this position often increase the depth of penetration, if one or both of you are capable of putting your weight back onto your hands then you can ‘arch’ backwards, which increases both friction and pressure.

Tip: Try putting a blanket down for comfort and then getting jiggy on the floor—the firm base often makes this sitting sex position easier than trying to balance on a bouncing mattress.

Pretzel dip

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Although technically a variation on sex from behind, the pretzel dip is, in reality, a combination of several different moves. Because it’s another that’s harder to explain than to do, we’re going to go back to using male/female descriptors, but as always, it can be adapted to suit pretty much anyone.

How to: The woman lies on her right side, with the man kneeling astride her right thigh.

He curls the woman’s left leg around his own left side, which puts both partners in a ‘sort of’ sex from behind position, but with the advantage of having hands free to access each other’s most sensitive spots.

Lotus 

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The lotus position is possibly the most romantically intimate position that you can bring into your repertoire. It requires a certain amount of flexibility and strength—mostly on the part of the penetrating partner—but once you’re in position, you’ll find it worth the effort.

How to: The giving partner sits cross-legged on the floor. The receiver stands astride them and then lowers themselves down onto their partner’s penis or strap-on. Once in position, the receiver also ‘crosses’ their legs—in reality, wrapping their legs around their partner’s back.

Tip: This is a position that lends itself to grinding rather than thrusting, making it perfect for those seeking some quietly satisfying intimacy or who want to make the enjoyment last as long as possible.

And it isn’t restricted to vaginal penetration—if the receiving partner leans back on their hands once they’re in position, it will make their anus accessible whilst allowing them to control the depth of penetration. The grinding rather than thrusting motion of this position also makes anal sex a more deeply intimate experience. 

Conclusion

Not all of these sex positions will work for everyone, but we are quite sure that giving them a go and enjoying the ‘ride’ rather than the destination will, at the very least, make for a fun night in!

Feeling comfortable with each other and acknowledging when things are going wrong as well as right will only enhance your communication and intimacy. We hope this guide will inspire you to give some new positions a try and expand your sexual horizons.